Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize
