Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
