One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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