the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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