you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
