this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
