can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize
