the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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