The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
