And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
