i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My butt remains clenched, sir.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
