i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Alive.
So much puke
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
