Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Sext me about skeletons
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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