SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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