So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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