Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
