Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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