Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
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