i came on her dog
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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