Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
