Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
