Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
