i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
