This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
