Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
