$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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