my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
