so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
