And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
