Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Randomize
