I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Come on in and take your pants off
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