It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
