Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Randomize
