Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
