That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
