wakey wakey hands off snakey
Duck Duck Cougar?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
