i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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