Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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