and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Randomize
