Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Randomize
