people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize