new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
My liver just had a heart attack.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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