I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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