Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
