So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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