Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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