Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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