I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
