im about as happy as oj after his trial
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
