So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
